“Death of a Unicorn” is a galloping, gonzo horror comedy that skewers the rich
Death of a Unicorn
Starring Paul Rudd, Jenna Ortega & Richard E. Grant
Directed by Alex Scharfman
Rated R
In theaters Friday, March 28
If you think, by the title, that this must be some pretentious, snooty foreign drama about the listlessness of a marriage, the unraveling of an idyllic dream, or the melancholic end of childhood—well, I can clear that up for you. It’s not.
In this galloping, gonzo horror comedy, a group of characters coalesce around the body of a young unicorn that’s been hit by a car on a mountainous road through the Rockies. Instead of trying to “help” the wounded creature, they instead finish it off with a gun and a tire iron—and then make plans to make a killing on the mind-blowing, magical potency of its blood and its glowing, serrated horn.
And they soon find out there’s also a mama and papa unicorn out there in the mountains, and boy, are they pissed.
The ensemble cast is full of familiar faces, and everyone is aboard for the thrill-ride terrors spiked with satirical skewerings of fat-cat rich folks who want to hubristically capitalize on something wild, wooly and wonderful that they don’t understand. Everyone gets their share of quick-witted quippery, snide remarks and snippy, character-revealing jibes. Paul Rudd plays a widowed lawyer who brings his daughter (Jenna Ortega) along to help him curry favor with the family of a dying pharmaceutical-company oligarch (Richard E. Grant). Téa Leoni is a spoiled wife, Will Poulter is a spoiled son, and Barry’s Anthony Carrigan is a put-upon butler. Steve Park and Suniti Mani are scientists called in for consultation about the little unicorn’s restorative powers, which can apparently clear up acne, rebuild failing vision, cure cancer—and maybe even thwart death.
“We’re gonna live forever!” someone crows enthusiastically. Well, not so fast.
When the parents of the junior unicorn—the junicorn, I guess—come looking for revenge, they begin skewering, impaling, eviscerating and stomping everything, and everyone, in sight. Blood flows, guts spill and heads get crushed. The “adult” unicorns are majestically monstrous fanged creatures with talons on their massive hooves, like the raptors in Jurassic Park crossed with bulked-up plow horses. And the movie certainly sets up its unctuous characters so we’ll root for the unicorns, eager to see who’ll get taken out next, with only a handful of exceptions, and how.
There’s a bit of mushy (human) family drama in the middle of all the gleefully gory goings-on, but it’s mostly a distraction. The special effects—the unicorns—don’t look very special, especially in the wake of some four decades of hi-tech FX advancements.
Ortega, who garnered multiple awards nominations for the Netflix Addams Family spinoff series Wednesday, plays Ridley, who feels a spiritual “connection” to the animals. It’s through her we learn of the legendary beasts’ deep-rooted place in folklore, mythology and religion—and how a “pure-hearted maiden” may be the only thing capable of taming them. And Rudd, with more than 130 acting credits in a spectrum of movies and TV shows, gets to do something he’s never done before: run for his life ahead of a unicorn as terrifying as a dinosaur. We didn’t see that in Anchorman.
And—in this age of declining biodiversity, intense droughts, polluted water, severe wildfires, rising sea levels and catastrophic storms, all brought on or exacerbated by human activity—Death of a Unicorn reminds us, yet again, that we abuse Mother Nature at our peril. Cause payback can be a real bitch, even if you don’t end up getting ripped apart by a couple of angry unicorns.
—Neil Pond
The Media Tourist 