Category Archives: Movie Reviews

Poolside with Swamp Dogg

Movie review: Wooly, wide-ranging doc spotlights the (almost) legendary cult musician and his friends

Swamp Dogg Gets His Pool Painted
Documentary
Directed by Isaac Gale & Ryan Olsen
Unrated
In theaters Friday, May 2

He’s recorded and released more than 25 albums, worked with superstars and written million-selling songs. And most people have no idea who he is. He’s Jerry Williams Jr., better known as Swamp Dogg, a Virginia-born musician who became a cult figure during more than seven decades on the fickle, not-quite-famous fringes of the music industry.

This pleasantly quirky, engagingly colorful documentary introduces us to Williams and his two longtime housemates, Guitar Shorty and Moogstar, who shared his ranch-style home in a leafy Los Angeles suburb—where, we learn, nearly all the neighbors seem to be making porn vids. Shorty and Moog also share Dogg’s on-again, off-again relationship with what might be considered success.

We learn that Williams, now in his 80s, made his first record in the mid-1950s, toured constantly, later becoming a label exec, a producer, arranger and a multi-genre songwriter, dabbling in disco, rap, R&B and country, co-penning (with Gary U.S. Bonds) the 1971 Johnny Paycheck hit “She’s All I Got.” He started his own label, releasing what surely must be the most commercially successful of all CDs of Beatles songs “performed” by dogs, chickens, cows and sheep (1983’s “Beatle Barkers”). He recorded a duet of “Sam Stone” with John Prine, performed on the Grand Ole Opry and had his own cable-TV cooking show, If You Can Kill It, I Can Cook It. In the early ‘70s, he was investigated by the CIA in the 1970s for protesting the war in Vietnam alongside actress-turned-activist Jane Fonda.

Somewhere along the way, he devised his alter ego, Swamp Dogg. Some of his album covers—depicting him riding a giant rat rodeo-style, as a hot dog slathered in mustard and onions, or as Jesus on a cross—are visual hints of his wide-ranging, wildly idiosyncratic takes on multiple formats of music.

The film shows him working in the studio on what would be his latest album, Blackgrass: From West Virginia to 125th St, released last year, blurring the lines between folk, blues, country, roots music and soul with a savory brew of new Swamp Dogg originals, favorites from past albums and timeless ‘50s R&B classics.

Swamp’s saga is a wooly, wide-ranging, hip ‘n’ flip tale of the ups and downs, ins and outs and upside-downs of a funky, improbably flexible lifetime in the music biz, the story of a true survivor who recounts much of his wildly unpredictable ride sitting in the shade of his backyard, watching an artist paint the bottom of his swimming pool. You don’t find out exactly what’s being painted until the end of the movie, but suffice it to say, it puts the perfect cherry on top of this swirly cinematic Swamp Dogg sundae.

Moogstar lives with Swamp Dogg in their “bachelor pad for aging musicians.”

One of the movie’s most endearing qualities is the turn of its spotlight often onto Dogg’s housemates in their “bachelor pad for aging musicians.” We learn how Guitar Shorty (whose death, in 2022, is covered in the film) was a winner on TV’s The Gong Show, and about a transformational encounter by Moogstar at the Montana gravesite of motorcycle-riding daredevil Evel Knievel. There’s a free-flowing, anything-goes kind of grooverey across time and space with a combination of archival footage, home videos and animation.

Dogg’s celebrity friends—like comedian Tom Kenny, the voice of Spongebob Squarepants, and head Jackass honcho Johnny Knoxville—also pop by the pool to swap tales and shoot the breeze. We meet one of Dogg’s five daughters, Jeri, now a neurologist. We learn how his late wife, Yvonne, became his lifelong anchor, partner and manager.

It’s a sweeping, often funny, sometimes profane and ultimately sweet story of a man whose wholly unique claim to pop culture spans decades and crosses just about all the boundary lines that typically define musical categorization. And you come away with the feeling that, despite all the yin and yang, the winning and the losing, the highs and the lows, the hits and the misses, Swamp Dogg—and Jerry Williams—wouldn’t have it any other way.

“I consider myself one of the luckiest motherf*uckers in the world,” he notes. After seeing Swamp Dogg Gets His Pool Painted, you’ll understand why.

Neil Pond

Fangs a Lot

Movie Review: Vampires attack a 1930s juke joint in ‘Sinners,’ a heady horror movie about…a bunch of things

Sinners
Starring Michael B. Jordan, Hailee Steinfeld, Miles Canton & Delroy Lindo
Directed by Ryan Coogler
Rated R

In theaters Friday, April 18

A phantasmagoric, blues-infused parable with a lot on its mind, Sinners brings together history, lore, music and mystical mojo into a spicy golly-whopper of a tale about lookalike twin veterans who return to their Mississippi homeland in the Jim Crow South after serving overseas in World War I.

Known as “Smoke” and “Stack” (and both played by Michael B. Jordan), the bros—toting a satchel of cash, likely from some gangsta-like postwar activities up north, in Chicago—want to open a social club where local blues artists can perform, people can gamble, drink, party and dance, and the money will flow.

But some vampires—yes, vampires—have other ideas. And they’re out for blood.

Director Ryan Coogler, who made his hit-movie bona fides with the Rocky spinoff Creed and Marvel’s Black Panther, shows he’s also adept with a rip-roaring, rampaging thriller about the undead, set to a vibe-rich soundtrack of deep-dish delta blues. Vampires, as you might recall, have always been depicted as seductive, sexually voracious creatures, and Coogler doesn’t shy from reminding us of that longtime connection. In Sinners, both the living and the dead clearly enjoy the pleasures of the flesh.

These vampires are also seductive in another way, “inviting” the living to join their ranks and exist for eternity, out of time, where all are welcome, regardless of credo or skin color.

The vampires represent several other things, too, including the “blood” ties of ancestry, the cross-pollination of cultures, a timeline connecting past and present, and the breaching of “boundaries” separating the living and the dead. The movie clearly evokes the fable of blues guitarist Robert Johnson, who was so “unnaturally” gifted that the story arose he must have breached that boundary, meeting the devil in a crossroads and selling his soul in exchange for musical talent.

In the movie, young guitar-toting “Preacher Boy” Sam (newcomer Miles Caton, making a most impressive movie debut), is chastised by his evangelist father (Saul Williams) about playing in honkytonks, making music for “drunkards and philanderers” and doing a dangerous “dance with the devil.” Sam is clearly the movie’s Robert Johnson surrogate, with Sinners suggesting that music has an almost otherworldly potency, a connective, life-changing power that can even open supernatural portals—like when the juke joint is suddenly filled for a dreamlike sequence with dancers and musicians across centuries. We see Native American spirit dancers mixing it up with hip-hoppers, twerkers and even a funkadelic guitarist. It’s a marvelously eye-popping head trip, just like when, later, a field full of vampires break into an extended Irish jig and a folk song, suggesting yet another regional current of musical heritage.

Hailee Steinfeld (above) is a femme fatale. Veteran actor Delroy Lindo plays Delta Slim, a bluesman with stories to tell. Britain’s Jack O’Connell is Remmick, the vampire chieftain.

It’s all woven into a rich, vibrantly detailed tapestry of the Great Depression South, with allusions to the region’s history of ugly volatility between Black and white culture, the concept of sin and transgression, themes of separation and segregation, and the thin line between faith and fear. It goes a bit gonzo in its second half, almost like Quentin Tarantino took the reins for the finale, when the blood finally flows and spurts, the vampires crash the party, and everything takes an explosively hyper-violent turn.

How does it all pan out? Well, you’ll just have to watch to see, but trust me, it’s a wild ride. Stay for the credits for a flash-forward with one of the central characters, now elderly (and played, in a nice touch, by real-life blues guitarist Buddy Guy).

A zestfully fresh take on thangs with fangs, Sinners invites you sink your teeth into the juicy, boldly unexpected turns of this spicy and sensual deep-South honky-tonk horror show.

—Neil Pond

Not So Picture-Perfect

Movie Review: “Art For Everybody,” about landscape artist Thomas Kinkade, shows the darker side of the so-called “Painter of Light”

Art For Everybody
Directed by Miranda Yousef
Unrated
In theaters Friday, April 18

This superbly crafted, warts-and-all documentary about the one of the world’s most commercially successful artists of all time pulls back the curtain on Thomas Kinkade, the self-proclaimed “Painter of Light,” to show how he wasn’t always so bright and sun-shiny.

Kinkaid rose to fame in the early ‘90s for his artwork featuring unnaturally illuminated pastoral landscapes, often glowing intensely with illumination from the inside of bucolic cottages in lushly rendered fairy-tale settings. His work was hyper-stylized, surrealistically calm and blatantly nostalgic. “I don’t really paint the world the way it looks,” Kinkade notes in an early interview. “I paint the world we all kinda daydream it could be.”  Fans lapped it up like syrup, and Kinkade became a multimillionaire through mass merchandised reproductions of his paintings and all kinds of spinoff lifestyle products, services and collectibles. He hawked his wares on TV’s home-shopping network QVC, and hundreds of Thomas Kinkade specialty stores sprang up in malls and retail centers across America.

But as the movie points out, critics were often dismissive of Kinkade, calling his work gaudy, garish and kitschy—or, as one says in the film, “really, really, really bad art.”

Kinkade offered populist, easily digestible, imaginatively wholesome alternatives to the edgier, often controversial and more “challenging” offerings of the modern-art world. In other words, he did paintings for the masses, art for everybody—or everybody else. Many fervent fans were drawn to his frequent professions of faith, seeing his paintings as calming, welcoming extensions of the Christianity he seemed to ardently embrace. Many of his pictures depicted religious stories or passages from the Bible.

But was all of it fakery, performance art or even fraud? Was Kinkade living a double—or triple, or quadruple—life, a man with multiple personas and personalities? The Painter of Light, as one of his daughters says, “was a side of him. But he had all these other sides.”

Told through archival film clips and narration by Kinkade’s family members, business associates, supporters, other painters and art experts, it’s a fascinating portrait of an artist who ultimately became “suffocated” by the commercial juggernaut he’d created. His empire eventually collapsed in lawsuits, financial ruin, allegations of fraud, a swirl of sexual indiscretions, and reports of aberrant, drunken behavior (urinating on a Winnie the Pooh character in a Disneyland hotel, fondling a woman’s breasts). He was accused of using evangelical Christianity as a cloak, a disguise to deceive—and sucker—an impressionable audience. Kinkade died, at age 54 in 2012, overdosing on booze and Valium.

“He had it all,” says his former wife. “And he threw it away.”

The most fascinating part of the film shows Kinkade’s now-adult daughters digging deep into his vault, a locked-away room where their father kept everything he’d ever drawn, showing us his early works and sketches—sometimes grotesque, turbulent and even violent depictions that suggest a much more tortured and troubled soul floundering in darkness rather than basking in the light he’d later make his brand. Maybe, suggests Kinkade’s sister, it had something to do with their abusive father, their parents’ divorce and growing up in a California “shack” often without heat or electricity.

In revealing the deeper demons that haunted—and possibly consumed—Kinkade, Art for Everybody shows how even the Painter of Light had a dark side. And how, as one critic notes, a cottage with such an unnatural glow just might be, in his oil-on-canvas fairy-tale world, an ideal deception for a wicked witch inside, waiting to gobble you up.

—Neil Pond

Horny Bastards

“Death of a Unicorn” is a galloping, gonzo horror comedy that skewers the rich

Death of a Unicorn
Starring Paul Rudd, Jenna Ortega & Richard E. Grant
Directed by Alex Scharfman
Rated R

In theaters Friday, March 28

If you think, by the title, that this must be some pretentious, snooty foreign drama about the listlessness of a marriage, the unraveling of an idyllic dream, or the melancholic end of childhood—well, I can clear that up for you. It’s not.

In this galloping, gonzo horror comedy, a group of characters coalesce around the body of a young unicorn that’s been hit by a car on a mountainous road through the Rockies. Instead of trying to “help” the wounded creature, they instead finish it off with a gun and a tire iron—and then make plans to make a killing on the mind-blowing, magical potency of its blood and its glowing, serrated horn.

And they soon find out there’s also a mama and papa unicorn out there in the mountains, and boy, are they pissed.

The ensemble cast is full of familiar faces, and everyone is aboard for the thrill-ride terrors spiked with satirical skewerings of fat-cat rich folks who want to hubristically capitalize on something wild, wooly and wonderful that they don’t understand. Everyone gets their share of quick-witted quippery, snide remarks and snippy, character-revealing jibes. Paul Rudd plays a widowed lawyer who brings his daughter (Jenna Ortega) along to help him curry favor with the family of a dying pharmaceutical-company oligarch (Richard E. Grant). Téa Leoni is a spoiled wife, Will Poulter is a spoiled son, and Barry’s Anthony Carrigan is a put-upon butler. Steve Park and Suniti Mani are scientists called in for consultation about the little unicorn’s restorative powers, which can apparently clear up acne, rebuild failing vision, cure cancer—and maybe even thwart death.  

“We’re gonna live forever!” someone crows enthusiastically. Well, not so fast.

When the parents of the junior unicorn—the junicorn, I guess—come looking for revenge, they begin skewering, impaling, eviscerating and stomping everything, and everyone, in sight. Blood flows, guts spill and heads get crushed. The “adult” unicorns are majestically monstrous fanged creatures with talons on their massive hooves, like the raptors in Jurassic Park crossed with bulked-up plow horses. And the movie certainly sets up its unctuous characters so we’ll root for the unicorns, eager to see who’ll get taken out next, with only a handful of exceptions, and how.

There’s a bit of mushy (human) family drama in the middle of all the gleefully gory goings-on, but it’s mostly a distraction. The special effects—the unicorns—don’t look very special, especially in the wake of some four decades of hi-tech FX advancements.  

Ortega, who garnered multiple awards nominations for the Netflix Addams Family spinoff series Wednesday, plays Ridley, who feels a spiritual “connection” to the animals. It’s through her we learn of the legendary beasts’ deep-rooted place in folklore, mythology and religion—and how a “pure-hearted maiden” may be the only thing capable of taming them. And Rudd, with more than 130 acting credits in a spectrum of movies and TV shows, gets to do something he’s never done before: run for his life ahead of a unicorn as terrifying as a dinosaur. We didn’t see that in Anchorman.

And—in this age of declining biodiversity, intense droughts, polluted water, severe wildfires, rising sea levels and catastrophic storms, all brought on or exacerbated by human activity—Death of a Unicorn reminds us, yet again, that we abuse Mother Nature at our peril. Cause payback can be a real bitch, even if you don’t end up getting ripped apart by a couple of angry unicorns.

Neil Pond

Oh, the Pain

In “Novocaine,” Jack Quaid dives into danger as a man with no feelings…sort of

Novocaine
Starring Jack Quaid & Amber Midthunder
Directed by Dan Berk & Robert Olsen
Rated R

In theaters Friday, March 14

When his office crush gets abducted, a young bank assistant manager sets out to rescue her. That sounds like it could be the setup for any number of flicks, but this gonzo action comedy hinges on the “ordinary” hero’s rare genetic disorder, which prevents him from feeling pain.

We learn that Nathan Caine (Jack Quaid, from TV’s The Boys) grew up with the nickname of Novocaine, given to him by bullying schoolmates who delighted in making him their recess punching bag; they enjoyed seeing him take a lickin’ and keep on tickin’. (P.S., Nathan’s condition is a real-world thing, CIP, or congenital insensitivity to pain, which affects a spectrum of bodily sensitivities.)  On a tentative first date at a diner, he tells Sherry (Amber Midthunder) that he dares not ingest solid food (he might chew up his tongue and not know it), and his wristwatch timer is reminding him to take a bathroom break (because he doesn’t get a natural “signal” that his bladder needs emptying).

But when the bank gets robbed and Sherry gets taken as a hostage, Nathan isn’t thinking about pee breaks as he plunges into a gauntlet of pain-free heroics, encountering sneering bad guys, booby-trapped lairs, flying bullets and body-slamming brawls. I must give the movie credit for finding, ahem, creative ways to illustrate just how impervious Nathan is to pain. He gets walloped in a wide variety of ways, like the coyote in a real-life Road Runner cartoon. He breaks his thumb to slip out of handcuffs and turns a broken bone—his own protruding tibia—into a lethal weapon. He has his fingernails pulled out with pliers, gets plugged with an arrow from a crossbow, almost crushed under a garage car lift, impaled with a medieval mace and calmly digs out a bullet from his arm.  

But here’s the thing. Nathan is no John Wick, no James Bond or Deadpool. He can be grievously injured, or even killed—he just doesn’t “feel” it, which puts him in even more peril. People with CIP won’t know spilled coffee can scald their hand, because they don’t get the “Ouch! That hurts!” message. That sets up the subplot, about how Nathan might not register physical discomfort, but he’s not immune from emotional distress. (The movie opens with REM’s “Everybody Hurts.”) Quaid, the son of actors Dennis Quaid and Meg Ryan, has an amiable everyman quality that squares with Nathan as an average guy, certainly no superhero, who removes the “dis” from his “disability” and dives right into danger.

And people do get killed. The movie’s rampaging dark humor doesn’t really jibe with all the blood and body goop, or when people expire via bullets or beatings.

Amber Midthunder, who has appeared in FX’s Legion and starred in The CW’s sci-fi drama Roswell, New Mexico, brings a tantalizing dash of ambiguity and vulnerability to her role as the “love interest,” noting that we’re all scarred by something, hiding a part of ourselves until someone lets us know it’s OK to show it. Matt Walsh, from TV’s Veep, gets in a few droll quips as a sports-obsessed cop.

But mainly, Novocaine wants to show Nathan enduring an avalanche of mayhem and make audiences squeal with perverse glee seeing him rebound from every body-abusing, bone-breaking, skin-scaring whack, crunch, burn, blast and kaboom. You may think it’s all giddy popcorn fun, but for me, I didn’t particularly enjoy being turned into a movie surrogate for those schoolyard bullies, who kicked Nathan’s ass repeatedly, every day, because they knew, hey, he can’t feel it.

At least, in The Road Runner, when the coyote gets flattened with an anvil to the head or smushed by a bolder, well, it’s only a cartoon—with no squishy viscera or protruding bones.

Neil Pond

Bruiser Babe

“Queen of the Ring” is the true story of the woman at the colorful center of a wrestling revolution

Queen of the Ring
Starring Emily Bett Richards, Josh Lucas & Francesca Eastwood
Directed by Ash Avildsen
Rated PG-13

In theaters Friday, March 7

Unless you’re a deep-dish wrestling fan, you probably don’t know about Mildred Burke, who dominated the sport for some 20 years as the “Kansas Cyclone.” This is her story, based on the 2009 book by Jeff Leen, The Queen of the Ring: Sex, Muscles, Diamonds, and the Making of an American Legend.

That title pretty much says it all—sensuality, brawn and glamour wrapped in wrestling tights. Emily Bett Richards, best known for her role as brainy Felicity Smoak on the CW series Arrow and its DC spinoffs, slips convincingly into the starring role of Burke, a single mom raising her baby boy while slinging hash in a small-town diner and dreaming of a way out of the boonies.

“I’ve always loved being feminine and tough,” Mildred says, hooked on the rough-and-tumble razzle-dazzle of seeing her first wrestling match, as a hyped-up crowd boos a hissable “heel” putting the hurt on a handsome “babyface.” The stars align when she meets a dashing wrestling promoter, Billy Wolfe (Josh Lucas), who gives her a shot in his traveling wrestling sideshow. Soon she’s grappling in carnivals with big sweaty guys from the crowd—and beating them.

And she finds herself falling for Billy Wolfe, several years older. Their “complicated” on-again/off-again relationship is a major crux of the movie, especially when she finds out he’s a cad, canoodling with other girls as he grooms them for the ring.  

Mildred becomes a ticket-selling draw, a wrestling superstar, a heroine to little girls, and a big part of the mainstreaming of “lady wrestlers” at a time when female wrestling was illegal in much of the country.  As a tagline for the movie notes, she becomes the first female million-dollar athlete in history—long, long, long before Venus Williams, Simone Biles or Coco Gauff came into the sports spotlight.

Director Ash Avildsen knows a thing or two about sports flicks. You might say they’re in his blood. He’s the son of Oscar-winning director John Avildsen, who made Rocky and three Karate Kid movies. Queen of the Ring certainly makes the most of its modest budget, and the wrestling scenes have the wallop and wham of authenticity. You’ll spot some familiar faces playing real people from the wrestling world. Walton Goggins (currently on HBO’s season three of The White Lotus) is East Coast wrestling mogul Jack Pfefer. Hey, isn’t that Francesca Eastwood (Clint’s daughter) as wrestler Mae Young, who has a thing for other girls in tights? And there’s Martin Kove, who played the original antagonist in The Karate Kid, as promoter Al Haft. Adam Demos (from the Netflix series Sex/Life) is “Gorgeous George” Wagner, who became a strutting superstar with a flair for flamboyant showmanship and a head topped with bountiful, blonde-dyed hair.

The movie strikingly recreates scenes and settings from its era-spanning story, from the 1930s into the ’60s, when television catapulted wrestling into dens and living rooms across America. (There must have been a separate line item on the budget for men’s fedoras and porkpie hats). And it gets a some further bona fides with appearances by real-life female wrestlers, like Toni Storm (an All Elite Wrestling world champion) and Kamille (nee Kailee Dawn Latimer), making her film debut as the towering, tough-as-nails June Byers, who would become, like Mildred, a Professional Wrestling Hall of Famer.  

Throughout the movie, we’re reminded that wrestling is highly physical—and sometimes dangerous, as wrestlers can be seriously injured, or even killed, in the ring.  But it’s also a show, a spectacle, a piece of stagecraft with characters, personas and plotlines. “I want to entertain people,” Mildred says. “I can’t sing, and I can’t dance. But I can tell a story.”

Stay for the credits and you’ll learn that Mildred Burke died, at the age of 73, in 1989. But her story is one of force, determination, reinvention and perseverance, and Richards digs in with a vigorous intensity to flesh out her character’s multilayered persona as a mother, breadwinner and savvy businesswoman who found success, fame and riches in a “man’s world.” This wrestling tale about the queen of the ring has a rousing ring of truth, especially for anyone who wants to learn more—in this Women’s History Month—about a woman at the center of a colorful chapter of wrestling history.

Neil Pond

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You Go, Girls!

Movie review: “Rule Breakers” tells the inspiring true story of a group of high school computer-whiz Afghans who rocked the world at international competitions

Rule Breakers
Starring Nikohl Boosheri, Ali Fazell & Waj Ali
Directed by Bill Gutenberg
Rated PG

In theaters Friday, March 7

Since it’s Women’s History Month, here’s some Women’s History—about a group of teenage girls from war-torn Afghanistan that came to America in 2017 to compete in a global robotics competition.  Based on their inspiring story, this emotionally stirring dramatic recreation reminds us of their impressive feat—from a part of the world at a time where girls and women were just beginning to emerge from the brutal oppressions of Taliban rule—and illustrates the courage of these young women, the power of dreams and the importance of education.

If you love “underdog” stories, Rule Breakers certainly falls into that category. It’s Rocky with robots. Canadian actress Nikohl Boosheri leads the cast as the determined young college student—based on Roya Mahboob, the real-life IT pioneer and software guru recognized by TIME magazine in 2013 for building internet classrooms in her native Afghanistan—who teaches a group of high school girls basic programming skills, then how to build and operate robots. But it’s not easy, as they navigate volatile—and violent—Middle Eastern politics and defy the country’s heavy-handed patriarchal norms to become a team, the Afghan Dreamers, and participate in competitions around the world.

The movie mostly follows familiar dramatic “beats” as the girls bravely break the rules…and navigate the perils, including Taliban threats, a roadside ambush and a mosque bombing that strikes tragically close to home. And the film certainly represents Mahboob’s advocacy for girls and women—the empowerment of education and the global “language” of STEM (science, technology, engineering and math)—as it shows young minds from varying cultures, religions, languages and customs coming together with a common goal of finding solutions to large-scale humanitarian problems, like detecting toxins in water and locating land mines, left over from deadly warfare, so they can be safely removed.

“The world has too many borders, and too many walls,” says one of the competition organizers, stressing the positive vibes of diversified global get-togethers that encourage cooperation and unity while fostering innovation, fueling young brainpower and creating bridges instead of barriers. “It’s not people building robots,” says one of the participants. “It’s robots building people.”

It’s also got a guest appearance by Fleabag’s Phoebe Waller-Bridge, and a performance spot for the Black Eyed Peas to remind everyone at a competition that “Tonight’s gonna be a good night.” There even some situational humor, and one scene—set in a thumpin’ German disco—where the girls shake off their head coverings, let down their hair and allow themselves a few glorious groovin’ moments before getting back to work. As Cyndi Lauper reminded us way back in the ‘80s, girls just wanna have fun. Even hajib-wearing, computer-coding, robot-rockin’ Afghani teens, taking a short break from breaking the rules, crossing borders and making the world a better place.  

Neil Pond

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Monkey See, Monkey Kill

The deep horror roots of the sinister simian wind-up toy in “The Monkey”

The Monkey
Starring Theo James, Tatiana Maslany, Colin O’Brien & Christian Convery
Directed by Osgood Perkins
Rated R

In theaters Friday, Feb. 21

As a horror flick, The Monkey certainly has its bona fides. It’s based on a 1980 short story by horror maestro Steven King, inspired by a much older classic creepy tale, The Monkey’s Paw, by British author W.W. Jacobs. One of the producers is James Wan, the creator of Saw, Insidious and The Conjuring franchises. The director, Osgood Perkins, made last year’s Longlegs, a wild ride of freakish serial-killer disturbia with Nicolas Cage and a demonic doll. And the director is the son of Anthony Perkins, forever enshrined in the halls of horror as the cray-cray, cross-dressing Norman Bates in Alfred Hitchcock’s classic Psycho.

Here, murder and mayhem swirl around a wind-up monkey “toy” that unleashes all kinds of hellzapoppin’ when someone turns the “key” on its back, making its mechanical arms start to bang on a drum. As a drummer myself, hey, I get it—some people don’t think much of drum solos. But at least no one’s ever died, as far as I know, because I dig into a roll or a few paradiddles.

Theo James (from the dystopian Divergent films, and season two of The White Lotus) plays double roles as the adult versions of twin brothers, Hal and Bill, who’ve grown up loathing each other. As kids (both effectively played by Christian Convery, from Netflix’s Sweet Tooth) rummaging through their dad’s collection of souvenir curios, they discover a box containing the monkey. “Turn the key and see what happens” is the instruction on a label on the monkey’s back.

What happens when the key gets turned is spectacularly bad news. People start to die, in twistedly inventive, Rube Goldberg-ian ways—decapitated by a flying knife at a Japanese steakhouse, trampled to death in a sleeping bag by wild horses, mangled by a lawnmower, beheaded by a cannonball, eviscerated with a speargun in a pawn shop. No one is safe when this monkey gets cranked.

Unlike some other evil “objects” or playthings (like the dolls in Chuckie, Anabelle, M3GAN or The Boy), the monkey doesn’t participate or engage in the mayhem. It doesn’t come alive and pick up a kitchen knife, like the South America voodoo doll in Trilogy of Terror, chasing Karen Black in the made-for-TV shocker back in 1975, or directly menace Telly Savalas like Talking Tina, the “Living Doll” on that 1963 episode of The Twilight Zone. This sinister simian is more a silent summoner of evil, an inscrutable avatar for the deep, dark pit of existential unknowable-ness, staring us down with a relentless, unsettling grin and a drumbeat heralding doom…for someone.

Elijah Wood (Frodo from The Hobbit-verse) has a scene as a gonzo parenting guru, and the director himself slips into the role of Hal and Bill’s swinger uncle.  

The movie, which often feels like a smart-ass comedic spoof and send-up of horror cliches, runs on gleeful, ghoulish humor and an embrace of its own wild, wooly weirdness—like the school cheerleaders who show up to rah-rah-sis-boom-bah at murder scenes. It’s also got a subtext about fathers and sons, deadbeat dads, the various toxicities that families “pass down” through generations, and the infallible truth that we’ll all inevitably meet our expiration date someday. The movie even literalizes a line from the Book or Revelation: “And I looked and beheld a pale horse. And his name that sat on him was Death.” Giddy-up!

“Everybody dies,” the boy’s mother (Tatiana Maslany) tells them, after the funeral of their babysitter. “That’s life.”

That’s certainly life with The Monkey, where a twist of its key always brings an insanely over-the-top, spectacularly splattery encounter with the grim reaper. Who’ll be next? How many more people will die? Is the Monkey the devil? Can it be stopped?

And can you ever hear the retro grooves of Sam Cooke’s “Twistin’ the Night Away” again without thinking of a grinning keyed-up monkey, lopped-off heads, killer bees, and how a cobra can leap out of a golf course hole and clamp down on your jugular?

—Neil Pond

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Movie Review: “You’re Cordially Invited”

Will Ferrell and Reese Witherspoon spar in raucous wedding comedy

You’re Cordially Invited
Starring Will Ferrell and Reese Witherspoon
Written and directed by Nicholas Stoller
Rated R

Streaming Thursday, Jan. 30, on Prime

“Things go wrong at weddings,” states Will Ferrell’s character in this raucous nuptials romcom—in which things do, indeed, go hilariously haywire as two wedding parties discover they’ve been mistakenly doubled-booked for the same time and place.

Ferrell plays the doting widowed dad planning the big day for his only child, his daughter (Suresh Viswanathan). Reece Witherspoon is the sister of another bride-to-be, wrangling the event for her younger sib (Meredith Hagner).  

Personalities clash and tempers flare as both groups compete for space, amenities, attention—and soon are plotting how each can foil and spoil the other’s day. The comedic mix has a terrific cast of supporting players, including standup comic Celia Weston, 30 Rock’s Jack McBrayer and veteran actress Celia Weston, who’s appeared in some 75 movies and TV series—and who dang near steals the show as a drawly Southern-belle matriarch. The shenanigans get crazily sideways, but in the middle of the mayhem is a soft, slushy message about dads, daughters, family ties and how love and loathing can be flip sides of the same canoodling coin.

Ferrell, a funnyman with impeccable cred from a slew of hilarious movies, and the versatile Witherspoon do their darndest to ride the seriously silly, anything-goes wavelength, synching up their fine-tuned comedic timing to the orchestration of director Nicholas Stoller, whose resume includes Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2008), a pair of fratty college yukfests (Neighbors and its sequel) and a boisterous redo of Gulliver’s Travels (2010) starring Jack Black. It has a lot of laughs, but it also sometimes strains to keep all the unrestrained wackadoo on a leash.  

You’ve certainly seen wedding comedies before, from Bridesmaids to Wedding Crashers and My Big Fat Greek Wedding. But you’re probably never seen one with such a crazy, anarchic ruckus, including a saboteur in a zebra costume, strip-club groomsmen, bawdy bridesmaids, and much more Hollywood attention to the Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers duet “Islands in the Stream” than it’s ever gotten before.

And is that NFL icon Peyton Manning just standing around, one of the Jonas Brothers as a singing pastor with a soft spot for Creed, and SNL veteran Bobby Moynihan as the host of a Masked Singer-esque hit TV show? Yes, yes and yes.

And indeed, as you may have seen in any of the marketing materials, Will Ferrell wrestles an alligator. So if you’re ready for a wedding that offers one uniquely unhinged, surprisingly heartfelt trip down the aisle, well, You’re Cordially Invited to this one.

Neil Pond

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Movie Review: “One of Them Days”

Keke Palmer and rapper SZA are seriously broke besties in this riotously funny street-smart female buddy comedy

One of Them Days
Starring Keke Palmer and SZA
Directed by Lawrence Lamont
Rated R

In theaters Friday, Jan. 17

Two broke besties have a wild day in L.A. in this raunchy, riotously fun street-smart female buddy comedy that kicks off the new year’s movie season with a load of laughs. When Dreux (Keke Palmer) and Alyssa (Grammy-winning rapper SZA, making a very impressive film debut) find out a freeloading boyfriend (Joshua David Neal) has absconded with their rent money, they’re off and running a crazy gauntlet of urban misadventures to get it back.

Along the way, they engage with a gaggle of characters who all contribute to the careening comedic spin. There’s the former stripper (Janelle James from TV’s Abbott Elementary) having a very tough first day working her new job at a blood bank. Another Abbott Elementary alum, Kayla Monterroso Meija, is a stressed-out clerk at a predatory loan company with a ridiculously high interest rate. Dreux swoons for a handsome guy (Patrick Gage) in a Mercedes, until she begins fretting that he might be an axe murderer. A voluptuous temptress (Aziza Scott, from TV’s Home Before Dark) certainly lives up to her nickname of Big Booty. When Alyssa recovers a pair of pricey Air Jordans off a power line, they run afoul of the shoes’ owner, a thuggish gang leader (Snowfall’s Amin Joseph). Euporia’s Maude Apatow is a chipper new—white—resident in the girls’ otherwise all-Black apartment complex, where she becomes an unlikely ally.

SZA and Keke Palmer star in “One of Them Days.”

But the movie belongs to Palmer and SZA, who have a natural, easy-flow chemistry as they plunge right into the riotous rush of it all, while an onscreen countdown clock keeps popping up to show how much time Dreux and Alyssa have left before they’re evicted from the apartment—or worse.

It’s wall-to-wall randy, rat-a-tat-tat zippy and zingy, peppered with f-bombs and other colorful zingers not meant for little ears. See if you can fill in the blanks of this sample of dialogue: “____, I got knocked on my ___ because of them ____.”  Asides about Black hair, Church’s chicken and one character’s, ahem, well-endowment all generated waves of raucous laughter at the screening I attended.

And underneath it all, there’s the foundational subtext of scrappy young Black women navigating jobs (and job interviews), testy romantic relations, depressing economic realities and rapacious rivals, while maintaining their own bonds of sisterhood. When they toast at the end, with Flaming Hot Cheeto margaritas, you’ll taste both the spice and the rich sweetness.

“It’s ghetto,” Dreux says, taking a sip, “but it’s got a runway quality to it.” You might say something similar about One of Them Days: It’s gloriously ghetto, but it totally runs with the gritty glamour of it all.

—Neil Pond

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